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  • Koko

Dear Past Self...

Dear Han,

First off- you made it. You keep making it, day after day; that's not something you believed could happen, hm? There was a point in time when I know you just couldn't fathom the idea of life changing or improving in any way. When all that you had was a pure hope that one day you'd be able to impact someone & see their lives change for the better.

All you knew was that, despite everything that kept taking shape in your path, you were meant to bring light to someone else's.

How? Well, that was the part that felt debilitating.

How do I help others? How will I know how to guide someone? How will I ever be able to afford education once I figure that out? How will I start a business that feels fulfilling? How will I succeed in a business that feels fulfilling? How, how, how?

In fact, it's that very same three letter word that put so much strain on your mind, there were times you thought you weren't meant for these passions at all.

Yet- you couldn't ignore this immense pull inside your heart to help other women. That feeling like there's got to be at least one way you could offer something that would be of actual service to someone. Thank you for not ignoring that.

But truthfully, I don't think you could have ignored that intuitive pull even if you tried. You were exhausting yourself trying to find jobs to keep you afloat, feeling depleted from hours spent working on someone else's dream, getting sick from being so "far away" from the path that was meant for you...

You later realized that was all your path, even the cold & lonely parts that seemed as if it was bringing you 10 steps backward.

You began a blog, a place to act as an outlet for all of the things you were opening up to...A safe space to document the natural magick that was existing right within our world but going completely unseen. A place to discover your true spirit.

From there, the path began unfolding before your very eyes. Opportunities manifested, connections transpired, and immense growth took & continues to take place every day because of it. You began to focus less on the dreaded three-lettered word "how" and focused on a new, more intriguing one instead...why?

Releasing control over how things were supposed to be, how they are supposed to look, and how Iyou would get there- was one of the greatest lessons you ever taught me. Because I learned that "how" becomes irrelevant as long as you know why you are after the things you've been desperately striving for. It creates the feeling of that fire in your belly, reminding you that if it's meant to be- it will be.

You taught me to do the work, learn the lessons, experience the growth, and to watch the amazing beauty that comes from it.

You taught me so much throughout a journey that sometimes left you feeling like you couldn't even tell which way was up.

And you continue to teach me that even when your world looks like it could fall to shambles, trust. In myself, in the process, and in the vision that I truly know why I'm called to.

Thank you for being stronger than I ever recognized you to be and for all the work you put in to get me here.

I'll take it from here, kid.


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